Sunday, July 08, 2007

Llorando

It's incredible to think of all of us out there in the world who want nothing more than to rest a head against a foreign body, passing each other in the street, continuing on with the same little empty space tucked somewhere deep inside. But it's all relative. I don't even need to elaborate upon why my concern of loneliness is partially ridiculous. Famine, hunger... these are much worse, and perhaps with my little plea I'm tempting the Gods of true loneliness. Let's hope not.

That's the thing- sometimes I feel like a spoiled fucking brat because I have a shell-shocked attitude regarding the things that surround me on a daily basis. I don't care about record reviews. I don't care about the internet. I don't care about the relative popularity of other similar bands who, apparently, the internet has told me I should view as competition. I care about writing music. I care about people, and they're getting harder and harder to hold close to me, or perhaps even to grasp in the first place.

Maybe it's because I'm lonely. Maybe it's because I'm hungover. Maybe it's because I came to the most beautiful city in the world and couldn't make it work. I wanted to relive that magical morning of my life with the marlboro lights and the window and the stack of NMEs.

Sometimes I get really scared because I don't care about anything, and that's just fucking stupid because in the moments where it's all seemed on the brink of loss I've never been more afraid. It's those seconds where you realize that you don't make your own rules that really shake you up.

When I get this way I have to comfort myself with the fact that I have music in my life. Music understands the fact that I run through life too fast and expect everything to happen instantly. I'm just going to give myself to the stage, go into hiding and write something great, bounce around and kick my feet and scream and strum and scream and strum...

22 Comments:

Blogger Stephen said...

Sometimes I feel the same way.

What bothers me is "the most beautiful city in the world" - that is a majority-based opinion. Though opinions are sometimes helpful, it's best to experience things on our own and make your own critiques.

You know what I consider beauty? Sitting alone in pitched black room at 2 in the morning while playing acoustic guitar. During those moments, I feel like nothing can go wrong. I only hear the words in my head and the sounds from my acoustic. But that is just my opinion.

Loneliness is hard to overcome. You don't need to be the most in-tune-with-the-world person to defeat it. Just do the things you love, see the people you love to see, and be yourself. Life will only be as great as you make it. The YOU that people see you as is only the YOU that you have shown them... unless you show them your whole self, they'll only know the partial YOU.

I hope I helped... if not, then I apologize for my ranting.

9:20 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I say sing on, scream on, kick on, strum on, write on and rock on. Just as long as you stay true to yourself and your music.

p.s. while you are at it ramesh, do go back to the most beautiful city in the world and get inspired to make some amazing "DJ. REMY MAC" remixes.

-kruti

8:54 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

We're all lonely sometimes..

Don't hang the head. Better times will come, I promise to you. ;)

PS: You should stop smoking.. it's a bad thing!

Greetings
Cerubis

1:13 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Dear Ramesh,

Hey. I love you.

I know things like that don't cure loneliness, especially when the word 'love' is bandied about so frivolously in our culture. But I think about you almost every day in some form or another, so perhaps that'll count for something. You're amazing. Beyond everything about Voxtrot, beyond the very concept of music itself - you're absolutely brilliant and beautiful and I love you so very, very much.

I could go on for pages, so intensely do I miss you... but I suppose such things are best reserved for more private methods of correspondence. Hello, MySpace.

Love,
Courtney Dee

10:24 PM  
Blogger Vicarian said...

Hey Ramesh, so sorry I missed you when you came to New York last month. The new album rocks my face. I want to have its babies.

I once thanked you after a show at the Mercury Lounge for "being so fucking awesome." Two seconds was never enough to say all I wanted to say about the sound you guys make and the words you write and the whole entire package which is at the top of my list of the best things I have ever heard.

So, again, for lack of anything more original, thank you for being so fucking awesome. I'll never stop loving what you do with the music in your heart.

2:45 PM  
Blogger soy momo said...

I know what you mean.
Every few weeks or so, an incidence will prompt me to reflect upon recent actions and if I've strayed a bit from who I want to be and what I really want to acheive. It only instills within a passion so deep that I've, sadly, gradually forgotten.

Every day is a new one anyways. Be whoever you feel like at the moment. :]

Cheers! And I hope you feel better by now.

1:42 AM  
Blogger gretchen said...

You're remembering - and reminding us - that all art has its roots in the sacred. Not necessarily in the religious sense, but in the sense that art is how human beings try to communicate with their higher selves and the higher selves of others. That's why it's got so much power.

Not to get too mystical, but yeah; when everything starts to get too compartmentalized and marketed all to hell, it's good to remind ourselves why we do this in the first place. Take care.

8:12 AM  
Blogger Becky said...

Loneliness
by Rainer Maria Rilke


Being apart and lonely is like rain.
It climbs toward evening from the ocean plains;
from flat places, rolling and remote, it climbs
to heaven, which is its old abode.
And only when leaving heaven drops upon the city.

It rains down on us in those twittering
hours when the streets turn their faces to the dawn,
and when two bodies who have found nothing,
dissapointed and depressed, roll over;
and when two people who despise eachother
have to sleep together in one bed-

that is when loneliness receives the rivers...

If you ever come back to Tallahassee, Florida, I promise to control my friends if there's a party. Or kill them. Whichever you prefer. --becky xo

11:54 AM  
Blogger chi-mee said...

Sometimes I think it's good to simmer in our loneliness. There's a gatha that I've come across and if you repeat
"Breathing in, I calm my body,
Breathing out, I smile
Dwelling in the present moment,
I know this is a wonderful moment!” (pg. 39) by Nhat Hanh’s Being Peace -- i realized how wonderful these moments are regardless of whether others are surrounding us or not.. and it's nice to simmer and dwell in moments with ourselves..
anywho! i just saw you this weekend at Pitchfork.. it was everything and more that I hoped for. I recorded you singing but my dinky camera couldn't capture the sound. You perform with such an energy of vibrancy and zest- i love it ^_^

here is the video:
http://youtube.com/watch?v=PV811i67GOc

2:16 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Some of your blogs, like this one, hit me to my core. You speak of things that I think about and wonder about and worry about and feel. I feel like you think in a way that is similar to a philosopher.

10:39 AM  
Blogger sean said...

Hey man, I was at your show last night in Baltimore and it was bad ass. I like that you can say you don't give a shit about what the internet "blogosphere" has to say. Good. Don't give a shit about what anyone thinks. Make your own music on your own terms and don't let the people who don't understand the new album influence you in any way.

The new album is subtle and brilliant and beautiful, easily your best work to date. I'm also pleased to see that the comments written about your blog are far more literate and articulate than most places on this dark internet.

You're absolutely on point about when you talk of how fickle people are becoming in their musical tastes. If they don't want to sit down and listen to your full album from start to finish, fuck em.

4:46 AM  
Blogger Bryan said...

i get very philosophical when i am hung over.

7:23 PM  
Anonymous mixa said...

Loneliness and art come hand in hand, don't they?

There's that notion that questions what do we make art for, or of - admit it or not, humanity takes a huge role in that. And we consider people, and we begin to perceive them in understanding or in hate or in love all because we take part in the everday function of what it means to be human.

But as our interpretations unravel, we learn that humanity isn't perfect. And we tend to veer away from it because it hurts us, the most beautiful part of our craft.

It's bullshit but it's painful when the things you mould your words and music after are the same things that don't seem to get it.

To be able to coincide with ourselves and what we want as artists, the ideal action is to block out the rest of the world for the perfect understanding. But more often than not, when we do so, we come up empty and insignificant to the human exercise of life. Because isn't that what humanity is about? connection?

So must we drown in the favours and intentions of others to define the course of our own? When we do, we find ourselves reduced to a vessel of their own theories, never our own anymore.

Conflict of an artist? Humanity in general? I'm not sure what I'm trying to say and it's not apocalyptic but well, blonde sharing.

9:32 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I think you're just really full of yourself. Everything is about you. Don't listen to anyone who brings you down! Just do what YOU want! Blah blah blah. Maybe you actually SHOULD listen to your critics in order to improve. Or maybe you should just keep telling yourself that they're wrong.

11:35 AM  
Blogger Liz Robertson said...

I really like your music, and I hope you DO write something great (once again). Come to Michigan again to play!

8:50 PM  
Anonymous Jackie said...

I know I am a little late.This was written a while ago...a long while ago and I may be a bit late now.

I had a response to this blog because I can completely relate like most of the people that have already responded to your blog.
But now I can just sit here numb and unable to describe in words.
I just feel.
The music flows out of my speakers and I can just feel.
Neutral Milk Hotel-Oh Comely does this to me and the loneliness seems to slip little by little.
I think I will scream on and strum and scream on as well.

12:40 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

some people on the internet care about your life. new blog FTW!

2:57 PM  
Blogger Naz said...

we all need to rant sometimes.
& why remy mac?
ramesh is uber cool.

6:54 AM  
Blogger Naz said...

we all need to rant sometimes.
why remy mac?
ramesh is uber cool.

6:55 AM  
Blogger Mike said...

Hello,

We would like to do an interview with you about your blog for
www.BlogInterviewer.com . We'd like to give you the opportunity to
give us some insight on the "person behind the blog."

It would just take a few minutes of your time. The interview form can
be submitted online at http://bloginterviewer.com/submit-an-interview

Best regards,

Mike Thomas

6:34 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Id have to say Voxtrot is by far one of the best new bands I have heard in awhile..Honestly if you like Voxtrot you should check out White Light Riot..they too are one of the best new indie rock bands!

11:19 AM  
Anonymous sonja said...

"I began to like New York, the racy, adventurous feel of it at night, and the satisfaction that the constant flicker of men and women and machines gives to the restless eye. I liked to walk up Fifth Avenue and pick out romantic women from the crowd and imagine that in a few minutes I was going to enter into their lives, and no one would ever know or disapprove. Sometimes, in my mind, I followed them to their apartments on the corners of hidden streets, and they turned and smiled back at me before they faded through a door into warm darkness. At the enchanted metropolitan twilight I felt a haunting loneliness sometimes, and felt it in others—poor young clerks who loitered in front of windows waiting until it was time for a solitary restaurant dinner—young clerks in the dusk, wasting the most poignant moments of night and life." -The Great Gatsby

I guess your not the only one . . .

7:20 PM  

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